Wednesday, November 7, 2012

In the picture

How is it possible that I just read this article today?? My friend, Lisa, told me about it weeks ago and I filed it away under Do That Sometime and then kind of forgot about it. I'm not a terribly sentimental person, not a "gusher", but The Mom Stays in the Picture, by Allison Tate, made me all mushy and lovey about my kids in a way that catching baby puke in my bare hands and wiping a three year old's ass just can't. 

Allison describes what so many mothers I know experience: a sort of non-existence in family photos. Sometimes it is because we are unhappy with our own appearance and don't feel compelled to immortalize it "on film", and sometimes it is because we are always the one behind the camera. Either way, we are missing. David jokes that if someone was browsing our photo books (or the many gigs of hard drive space that house our would-be photo books), they would assume he is a single father.

But Allison writes something in her article that hit me like a sack of hammers: 

"Someday I won't be here -- and I don't know if that someday is tomorrow or thirty or forty or fifty years from now -- but I want them to have pictures of me. I want them to see the way I looked at them, see how much I loved them. I am not perfect to look at and I am not perfect to love, but I am perfectly their mother."

There is nothing I can add to that - it is so perfectly stated. 

Sam and mum May 2010

1 comment:

  1. I "filed it away" as well and after I finally read it I realized the same thing. That the kids have no pictures of them with me, or just me. So I have started to get in some of them. My issues for not being in pictures are my issues, not theirs. Love the blog!